


Bardic Lore

by Fallowsthorn



Series: Book of Sanguine [1]
Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Comedy, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, in-universe pornography
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-11-16 05:09:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11246976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fallowsthorn/pseuds/Fallowsthorn
Summary: Sanguine, the Daedric Prince of lust, greed, and indulgence, decides that he's going to write his own porn. Should be easy enough, right? Right?





	Bardic Lore

**Author's Note:**

> So I deliberated a little on how to order these, but I think the easiest way is as stories in a series rather than chapters in a story, because then there won't be a million tags on the one fic that make it basically impossible to find what you're looking for. Also this is really old and I think I originally wrote at least this on the Skyrim Kink Meme, but hell if I can find the link anymore.

Sanguine didn't tend to do much in the way of work. It wasn't really in his job description, you might say. When it came to sex (and eventually, most things did), the mortals thought up all sorts of creative things, after which Sanguine and everyone else involved had a lot of fun with them. Mostly he spent his time either wandering about on Nirn getting into trouble, or wandering about in mortals' heads getting them into trouble by way of careful suggestion, both of which were extremely entertaining but the latter of which carried much less potential for getting into even more trouble with whoever'd caught him, since his hosts tended to be bothered by weird things like guilt and shame and so on.

Even given this, it still may come as something of a surprise that Sanguine did not discover porn immediately. In retrospect, it was a surprise to him as well. The first time it had happened, he'd been drawn to the lusty thoughts of some mer, only to discover that those lusty thoughts were directed at a particularly intriguing woodcut of some poor woman whose spine looked very uncomfortable. Sanguine had steered the mer towards several actual women, and suggested that she learn some proper anatomy, hands-on.

He'd lost track of time after that for a while, which admittedly wasn't all that rare of an occurrence, and the next time he'd come across a document of the inanimate but decidedly sexual nature, it had been at the hands of an artist who was trying to walk the fine line between tasteful nudity and what his paintbrush really wanted to do, which was along the lines of "forgetting" that the woman in front of him had a draped cloth obscuring all the really good bits, and that her expression was more bored than orgasmic.

Sanguine had been leaning over the man's shoulder at the time, and decided to hurry things along a bit. The cloth had made an excellent blanket.

While he was lying there playing idly with the woman's hair and not wanting to leave just yet, he thought about this. It was more of an event than it sounds; Sanguine, as a rule, didn't do a whole lot of thinking, and didn't much like to inspire it in others. Still, this was something worth thinking about.

Sanguine knew that people paid for sex, which always struck him as silly, seeing as how there were plenty of people willing to give it out for free, himself included. But more importantly, that meant that there was a shortage, and while masturbation wasn't one of Sanguine's favorite pursuits (relatively - it was still quite nice, all things considered - better than Molag Bal, certainly, though that sometimes depended on Sanguine's mood), there were enough similarities between that and pornography that he could see the latter being a worthwhile pursuit.

The Daedric Prince hummed to himself, got the man and woman interested in each other again, and quietly vanished while they were distracted. They were charming; perhaps he'd visit them again.

Never mind that, though. There was research to be done. Sanguine dropped by the home of someone who was having some alone time with a book that was kept on a high shelf, convinced her that she'd fallen asleep and was dreaming about having wonderful sex with the main character and several of the other ones besides, and stole a handful of the books when she'd fallen into a real slumber.

Four or five hours later, he'd gone through them all, some more than once. Except for one, which had been absolutely terrible, and now did not exist. Anywhere. Ever. Sanguine still maintained that actual sex was more fun, as it was hard to chase or seduce a book, but this was certainly less work, and it involved a good deal more interesting things that were technically anatomically (or physically, or religiously) impossible. He'd even found a mention of himself in one of them, which was pleasing. He wondered idly for a moment if he ever got mentions in memoirs, then decided he didn't care enough to find out.

It was around this time when the thought occurred to him to write his own porn. He'd be a natural at it, of course, and it would be hotter than anything this - he checked the author of the books, and to his delight discovered that the three best ones were written by the same person - this Sultris Amor could write. Huh. Nice pen name, if a little silly. Then again, not much of any of this took itself too seriously. Neither did Sanguine, come to think of it.

Eventually (after another read-through of one of the books, just to check that Sultris Amor was worthy of the name), the logical thought made itself known to Sanguine: while he did know sex very well, he hadn't ever tried writing anything, much less about something so... distracting.

Unfortunately, when Sanguine tried to find someone on Nirn who was currently writing porn, or at least writing while thinking dirty thoughts, Sultris Amor was nowhere to be found. There was, however, some young fool who prided himself on his eligibility to almost every woman in his city, and was thinking about that "fact" (and what he'd like to do to confirm that eligibility) a great deal while writing.

Sanguine, who had next to no work ethic or discerning taste, appeared behind the young man as he was bent over a desk, scratching away with a quill by the light of a candle. His presence went unnoticed for the moment, and he seated himself quietly on the man's bed, noting the late hour and closed door, and enjoying the man's thoughts without really guiding them much. He was wearing a male Imperial guise, one of his favorites, and he could feel himself get aroused just from what was going through the Nord's head. This was impressive, until you considered how often Sanguine got aroused.

The man must not have been very perceptive, because he didn't even turn around when Sanguine's very apparent arousal started affecting his own ability to concentrate. At this point Sanguine was trying very hard not to make a noise, because he was split about evenly between laughing himself off of Nirn and simply fucking the young man silly, and he wanted to figure out which he should do before anything spontaneous happened. Sanguine was usually a fan of spontaneity, but this was just too good an opportunity to waste.

Hilariously, while Sanguine was having his little internal debate, the man had decided that his erection must be a result of his writing or his thoughts, and was moving his hips slowly, almost absently, just out of reach of the desk. Sanguine had to admit, it made for a tantalizing picture. The Daedric Prince decided enough was enough, and took a quick swipe at the man's thoughts to see what he'd like in the way of sex.

Ooh, a virgin? Well, that was interesting. Sanguine figured he might go easy on the Nord; after all, he'd been so awfully obliging.

The man's body flushed with true arousal, and he finally set his quill down and moved to the side, shutting the book and loosening the tie on his pants. Sanguine read the title crookedly. _A Gentleman's Guide to Whiterun_. That was an interesting definition of "gentleman". The ones Sanguine had known had all been very boring, at least until Sanguine had... well, introducing himself usually did the trick. Especially if introducing himself involved any degree of clothing coming off.

And then finally, _finally_ the young Nord picked up the candle and turned to face Sanguine, about whose intentions, though he was still clothed, there was not much reasonable doubt.

Sanguine barely restrained himself from laughing when the man let out a shriek and dropped the candle, which promptly went out. He took a moment to remember what he was wearing for continuity's sake, smiled when it turned out to be a mage's robes (though which mage, he wasn't entirely sure), and sent a ball of hovering light to float between them.

"Who - what - who are you?" the man croaked. Sanguine gave up on reading the man's thoughts, since there wasn't much he was going to get in the way of useful information from that.

"No, you were right the second time," Sanguine said amiably. "I can be a dream, pleasant or disturbing; I can be a stranger in the dark; I can keep being a stranger in the dark if you'd like, that's always fun and mysterious. Mostly I'd like to have sex with you, and I'd like you to enjoy it as well, since I don't like giving _him_ any more power than he already lords over the rest of us."

"Uh, what?" the man said, totally lost.

Sanguine sighed. "Never mind," he said, and patted the bed next to him. The man sat down, probably because he had no idea what else to do.

"Um," the man said, pressing his palms to his eyes. "Um. How did you get in here?"

"I entered from my domain in one of the ever-stretching planes of Oblivion."

"Right. The door then. Dumb question, sorry. Look, um, whoever you are, this is nice and all - well, actually it's really weird and I'm not sure I'm not hallucinating, but - er, it's not that I necessarily have a problem with sleeping with you, and I'm sure you're very good at it - I mean, I didn't mean it like that, I meant - screw it, Divines know what I meant, but, um, er, you see, the thing is...."

The man's head dipped at he started scrutinizing the floor, and Sanguine, who'd been listening in to the man's thoughts again, noticed with his razor-sharp deductive skills that while the Nord was stumbling through some kind of monologue explaining his virginity, his brain was showing him a variety of fantasies, some of which looked as though they'd been inspired by Sultris Amor.

The other fascinating thing that Sanguine was paying more attention to than whatever was coming out of the young man's mouth was the fact that throughout all this drivel, neither of their erections had really gone away. Still not listening to the man, Sanguine reached out and put his hand firmly in the Nord's lap.

The man lost the end of his sentence to a stuttering exhalation and threw a desperate, embarrassed look Sanguine's way. Sanguine grinned and swung himself around to straddle the man and meet his hips as they rolled upwards. Spatial relations kindly looked the other way for the few seconds it took him to get rid of his robe.

There was a brief silence while the Nord blinked and tried to make what was going on resolve itself into some sort of sense. Sanguine cocked his head to the side. "You got a name?" he asked abruptly. "I'm getting kind of tired of epithets."

The man blinked hard, once, then decided something. "Mikael," he said, and by way of introduction kissed Sanguine firmly on the mouth.

Sanguine loved introducing himself to gentlemen.

Mikael pulled away and regarded Sanguine, looking him up and down until his gaze landed in their laps. "You're very male," he said, sounding equal parts nonplussed and dazed. "Did you drug your mouth or something?"

Sanguine looked down too, for lack of a better response. "I'm gonna go ahead and hope those two statements aren't related. Yes to the first and no to the second, though I have been told my presence is intoxicating. I could be female if you like," he suggested.

Mikael looked up at him in squinty confusion. "You're not human, are you?"

"Give the man a sweetroll. Do you really care, is the better question."

In answer, Mikael leaned back on his elbows and arched his body up so that his hips were pressed against Sanguine's. That would be a no, then.

Satisfied that Mikael was on board, Sanguine tilted his head back and hummed deep in his throat, letting his mouth fall partway open so that the sound became a low moan.

"Shh!" Mikael hissed. "Other people will hear you."

"So?"

There was a beat of silence where they both stared at each other. Mikael pushed at Sanguine's shoulders. "Can't talk if there's something in your mouth," he reasoned.

Sanguine grinned even as he yielded to the pressure, sitting so that he could rut against the bedframe. There was some shuffling around, after which Mikael's legs ended up wrapped around Sanguine's torso and Sanguine's hands were braced on either side of Mikael. "Wanna bet?"

"I'd lose that - _oh, Divines_ -"

Sanguine huffed out a laugh and left off licking to press his lips to Mikael's cock. "Don't swear by them," he said against the skin, and Mikael groaned at the sensation, barely hearing Sanguine. "Swear by me."

"You didn't - I don't - know - your name," Mikael gasped out, a bit hampered in the process of coming up with a complete sentence. Sanguine, fairly confident in the reaction he'd get, told him.

The noise Mikael made was half vaguely alarmed and half intensely erotic. Sex won out over irreverence, though, especially when Sanguine stopped teasing and took Mikael's cock in his mouth. He was rewarded with fingers twisting in his hair, half-trying to hold his head in place, and Mikael spitting out, "Sanguine!" like it was a curse.

Sanguine shivered at the sound. All Daedra love worship, love to hear their names exalted, and Sanguine was no different. In a human it would be narcissism; in Sanguine it was also a power trip.

Mikael took the hint and said, "Sanguine," again, lowly. Sanguine sucked, feeling the rush of Mikael's pulse on his tongue, and the fumbling gasps above him became a chant, rambling and incoherent in places but visceral and filthy and _perfect_.

Sanguine gave in to sensation, pressing up needily against the hard bedframe, not caring that the wood dug into his abdomen, achingly aware of the way his name sounded spilling out of Mikael's lips, tumbling and consorting with "yes" and "fuck" and "please". He grabbed Mikael's hips and held him in place, and almost unconsciously made a soft, low noise that wavered and dipped into a hum.

Mikael suddenly went very still and very quiet, and then he was coming, bucking against Sanguine's hands and pulling him closer with his legs. Sanguine swallowed him down greedily, taking everything he could get from the man as though it were offered by ritual.

The Daedroth lifted his head to see Mikael staring down at him far too intensely for someone who'd just had an orgasm.

"Sanguine..." he breathed, and Sanguine let his back arch as he came, shuddering and tensing and riding the rolling high of sex and sacrifice.

"Ohh...."

Sanguine blinked lazily from where he'd slumped down, not nearly as concerned as before about keeping himself relatively upright. Belatedly, he realized that he'd held on to Mikael's hips too tightly, and there might be fingerprint-bruises later. He smirked and ran his hands over the skin, as if his touch was making it conform to the muscle and bone beneath, then hoisted himself up on the bed beside Mikael.

Mikael, before letting his head fall back with a thump, had taken off his shirt, and was using it to half-heartedly clean himself up; Sanguine didn't bother, knowing that he wouldn't be wearing this body long enough to have it matter. After a minute or so spent in comfortable silence, Mikael looked up with a confused frown. He stared at the ceiling for a moment, trying to think of something, then turned to Sanguine.

"I don't remember taking my pants off," he said. "Or my shoes. Or my underclothes. And where did your robe go?" As he added things to the list, he got more and more perplexed, and eventually sat up fully to look around the room. Sanguine waved a hand at him, having lain down, albeit only halfway on the bed.

"Don't think about it too much, or it won't have happened. Robe never existed, as far as I care. If you want it back your clothing's under the bed."

Mikael gave in to his curiosity and looked; sure enough, he retrieved a neatly folded pair of pants, which had presumably been next to his other clothing. Unfortunately for him and Sanguine's patience (already a scarce commodity as it was), this didn't really help as far as confusion went. "But... I don't remember...?" he tried, glancing at Sanguine. "Do I want to know what's going on?"

"Do you want to have more sex?"

"...Not... right now?"

"Then hush."

Mikael blinked at him, shrugged, and did so; it was only after he was asleep and Sanguine was thinking about doing the same (it was warm, and Sanguine was nothing if not indulgent and lazy) that the Daedric Prince realized he hadn't actually learned anything from this.

Well, that wasn't true. He'd learned he should fuck more virgins, as they were fun to corrupt. But he hadn't learned anything about writing porn.

Sanguine scowled. This was almost turning into something like work. Still, it had to be said that he'd had a lot of fun in the last hour, and it stood to reason that if he kept looking for someone knowledgeable, he'd have more.

Perhaps he should keep an eye out for Sultris Amor.

With that thought in mind, Sanguine nodded to the air, made sure Mikael was asleep in a way that wouldn't hurt in the morning, and vanished. The hovering light winked out with him.


End file.
